Tuesday, November 5, 2013

stage fright

i was right in the middle of something,
when i died, just like that.
my first thought, when i saw myself on the floor,
was to right the chair i had been sitting in.

i tried, but
my hand went through it like a breeze.

i had just really started to believe that i was gone
when the light appeared, just like they always say.
c'mere, said the angels,
take the tunnel ride to Endsville.

oh no.
oh nuh nuh nuh nuh nooooooooo.
i got stage fright.
i could see all my dead relatives waiting for me
under a picnic tent,
but i couldn't move, any more than my poor body could.

so i stuck around a while,
rapping on stuff and turning on the lights when no one was home,
but when they brought in a team to investigate me, i had to stop.
they held out a little microphone and asked,
"are you there?
what do you want us to know?" 
they were looking for EVPs, but 
i got stage fright.

i was one miserable gal after that.
i sat around all night, silent as the tomb,
and during the day i was hardly even there at all,
thin and pale as a sheer curtain.

into my misery and loneliness came the beautiful Saint Creola.
she said, "this way, toots," and held out her lovely hand.
when i hesitated even still, she added,
"i'll go with you. c'mon."

when you go down that tunnel, you spin.
did you know that?
you spin like a windcatcher.
i wobbled toward the picnic tent like a bowery drunk.
my old dog was there,
but Saint Creola had gone.

she knew that he would take good care of me,
soothe my nerves,
do dumb stuff to make me laugh until i got used to the place
and even afterwards, too.
woof!
welcome to Endsville.
on your marks, everybody.
annnnnnnd....
scene two. take it from the top!
and i did, just as if i'd been raised center stage by inveterate hams.
________

picture: cristina scabia of lacuna coil


11 comments:

TexWisGirl said...

ahhh. found your way 'home'. :)

Margaret said...

I've seen this Ghost Hunter's show! It's my favorite one of the series :)

I love how you start off - and just your great imagination to explore this subject like this. Always interesting, Shay.

Buddah Moskowitz said...

Perhaps this is how the grand reunification is - who's to say? I liked it though.

hedgewitch said...

The disorientation seems worse than the actual departure--change is so hard, especially when your ectoplasm hurts. Your grasp of the intangible realm within, Shay, is never more on target than here.

grapeling said...

do they have the 'clap-on clap-off' lights in the afterworld?

myheartslovesongs.com said...

this is toooooooo good! love, Love, LOVE it!

{aren't you working overtime? you shouldn't have ANY spare time to write... especially not when it's so much better than everyone else's...) {{whine}}

myheartslovesongs.com said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
HermanTurnip said...

As someone who suffers from an extreme and unnatural fear of public speaking, I can completely relate!

Helen said...

.. and that's all she wrote, folks! Doesn't sound all that bad, that afterlife thing! Wind catchers and my beloved pets ....

Mama Zen said...

So that's who was screwing with my lamp!

Daryl said...

i had a dream just like this last .. i swear