tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3107838361391025851.post6796690339885474752..comments2024-03-28T21:52:15.546-04:00Comments on Shay's Word Garden (Poetry & Such Like): If You Had AskedFireblossomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07040525704916368792noreply@blogger.comBlogger11125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3107838361391025851.post-36937213432929758992013-05-16T13:00:14.239-04:002013-05-16T13:00:14.239-04:00You labeled this "hearing a pin drop." ...You labeled this "hearing a pin drop." Yes, exactly.Maude Lynnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03669688074743095866noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3107838361391025851.post-11148151599962485172013-05-16T04:39:02.966-04:002013-05-16T04:39:02.966-04:00that final line is such a sublime ending for your ...that final line is such a sublime ending for your (as ALWAYS) stunning poem, Sis! this one floated from my eyes through my mind on a melody that's been carried by the wind for the thousand years of her existence. just gorgeous imagery!!<br /><br />♥Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3107838361391025851.post-14440488292134227842013-05-15T21:33:45.942-04:002013-05-15T21:33:45.942-04:00I, too, love the "anthill made of girl"....I, too, love the "anthill made of girl". This poem is breathtaking - one of your best, and since all of your poems are superlative, that is really saying something! I adored every line.Sherry Blue Skyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10769154286598233146noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3107838361391025851.post-11890650777481401842013-05-15T12:32:40.513-04:002013-05-15T12:32:40.513-04:00"and here among the lions,
I think it best, ..."and here among the lions, <br />I think it best, now, that I remain silent."<br /><br />...cat(s) got your tongue in a beautiful way Shay. I really enjoyed this.Jennifer Wagnerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04344877737695801883noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3107838361391025851.post-37398457641863674352013-05-15T11:03:12.454-04:002013-05-15T11:03:12.454-04:00an anthill made of girl. just brilliant.an anthill made of girl. just brilliant.TexWisGirlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13641962051044162710noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3107838361391025851.post-45669662454878555822013-05-15T10:52:24.609-04:002013-05-15T10:52:24.609-04:00There are two places in this poem where I stopped ...There are two places in this poem where I stopped short my reading for a wow moment. Firstly in the opening lines: <br />I am sitting with the lions. <br />I didn't go to them--<br />they came to me...<br />This is such a great set-up for what is to come.<br /><br />And this description of the zebras' call:<br />when they have made their distinctive coughing call,<br />I have always looked up<br />as if expecting a lover to say something kind...<br />Which sets up the transition from admirer to predator brilliantly.<br /><br />Then the entire second last stanza is amazingly self-contained, so poignant and poetic in thought and expression.<br /><br />Much enjoyed!<br />Kerry O'Connorhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00720862912375945249noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3107838361391025851.post-20793049648259298512013-05-15T09:36:00.628-04:002013-05-15T09:36:00.628-04:00The starkness of death and the richness of life co...The starkness of death and the richness of life contrast sharply here even as the line between them seems to blur and blend--is it about the simplicity which is the brusk difference between the white and black of the zebra, or the complex congruity of the lions and flies messaging how things fit, even the dark things, into the weave of the Big System whereby we are all consumed, eventually. The thing that strikes me most is the feeling of isolation and loss, that 'the anthill made of girl' turns from warmth to dust....beautiful, shadowy, amazing piece, Shay.hedgewitchhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13090696134322515899noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3107838361391025851.post-75090207648573597292013-05-15T09:25:26.453-04:002013-05-15T09:25:26.453-04:00This is amazing. I love these sections best, but i...This is amazing. I love these sections best, but it's all gripping, gorgeous imagery with such impressive depth:<br /><br />"I am sitting with the lions, but I am by myself.<br />I can see for miles in every direction,<br />but I cannot see the curve of the earth."<br /><br />"but it is just the lions idly batting me to the ground<br />like an anthill made of girl"<br /><br />"I have been a river, pure and deep,<br />a few dozen dreams from the place you sleep"<br /><br />And that ending. Wow! I love the last stanza. This is definitely on my favorites list.<br /><br />The central theme here is that sometimes you're too close to something to see what it really is, what's really going on. Too close to the earth, too close to the zebras, too close to a person. It covers yours eyes with dust, this closeness. Before long, you can't even see your own reflection.Alicehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09212391351233448784noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3107838361391025851.post-16658219378122815052013-05-15T08:59:45.185-04:002013-05-15T08:59:45.185-04:00I love how you captured my imagination and send it...I love how you captured my imagination and send it to wild Africa...Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11213895832127088168noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3107838361391025851.post-74664918929205864322013-05-15T08:52:56.917-04:002013-05-15T08:52:56.917-04:00I loved this, Shay, and the about remaining silent...I loved this, Shay, and the about remaining silent...just perfect. That's what I love about inspiration...it comes from so many places. I'm grinning that this was inspired, in some small way, with my dandy lions :)TALONhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03205633556998220372noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3107838361391025851.post-63214520735634883952013-05-15T08:00:53.414-04:002013-05-15T08:00:53.414-04:00They want death, but death is inside,
great line s...They want death, but death is inside,<br />great line shay...and how you use life/death in the stripes of the zebra...and how your views are changing from hearing the zebra as a lover....the last stanza, love how you make it all warm and personal, the yearning...love the conversational tone of this as well...bittersweet is a great word for the choice to stay among the lions...Brian Millerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00722940075884718007noreply@blogger.com