tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3107838361391025851.post7277565374906069281..comments2024-03-28T09:11:04.513-04:00Comments on Shay's Word Garden (Poetry & Such Like): The SwansFireblossomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07040525704916368792noreply@blogger.comBlogger15125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3107838361391025851.post-2802000355123151462013-01-18T02:09:30.568-05:002013-01-18T02:09:30.568-05:00damn it! go back to work, woman!
{stomping away.....damn it! go back to work, woman!<br /><br />{stomping away.... mumble, grumble, bitch and moan}<br /><br />♥Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3107838361391025851.post-82260761090489554072013-01-17T22:48:07.695-05:002013-01-17T22:48:07.695-05:00>>Rubs hands together >> fails to comm...>>Rubs hands together >> fails to comment eloquently. Bear with me here, peanut, cause this I am running on fumes, but this piece has put a little fuel back in my brain. <br /><br />On a macro level (and this is just my reading of it) there are so many mythological references--the swans, the sun dial, the lion's head, the spinning ring--that I feel immersed in a hypothetical universe rich with possibilities and cruelty.<br /><br />I love the blending of those "arcane" symbols with the wine glass and the ouija. I also like that I am a bit uncertain about what this poem is about (much like the boards final answer)....the third verse being my favorite, obscured but also forth right. Wunder bar and viva laIsadora Gruyehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13036782300945079952noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3107838361391025851.post-10202768722027362122013-01-17T05:17:41.758-05:002013-01-17T05:17:41.758-05:00Oh, the irony in the beauty and seeming benevolenc...Oh, the irony in the beauty and seeming benevolence of a swan from afar and its disingenuous nature when one invades its space. <br /><br />Like the sound of that ring makes as it winds down from spinning on the cold hard floor after falling from that now empty finger. <br /><br /> Marcoantonio Arellano (Nene)https://www.blogger.com/profile/10713672589582754484noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3107838361391025851.post-78430391729978962122013-01-17T00:25:39.471-05:002013-01-17T00:25:39.471-05:00What imagery...wine bottle, Ouija board, swans...s...What imagery...wine bottle, Ouija board, swans...seems you conjured up quite a write. Susie Clevengerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09239990133754328967noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3107838361391025851.post-82250507576893008972013-01-16T22:03:22.470-05:002013-01-16T22:03:22.470-05:00Awesome vibe to this piece!
Oh,and swans can be m...Awesome vibe to this piece!<br /><br />Oh,and swans can be mean mamma jammas when they want to. I've been unlucky enough to be chanced twice by said beasties. They're pretty from afar, but a terror up close!HermanTurniphttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15448138758753193112noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3107838361391025851.post-20552192181291248652013-01-16T19:52:49.127-05:002013-01-16T19:52:49.127-05:00WINTF is your book of poetry coming out? A chap bo...WINTF is your book of poetry coming out? A chap book? A handwritten volume, penned on legal pads?<br /><br />When?Sioux Roslawskihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17924021828536277618noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3107838361391025851.post-21346624147151894312013-01-16T17:44:17.191-05:002013-01-16T17:44:17.191-05:00My, my, my! To me, this is just full of unexpecte...My, my, my! To me, this is just full of unexpected imagery. I adore "its bones exploding as if it had the bends."Maude Lynnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03669688074743095866noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3107838361391025851.post-58460149543551387502013-01-16T16:31:08.863-05:002013-01-16T16:31:08.863-05:00I can't even speak. Only gasp for breath that ...I can't even speak. Only gasp for breath that will not come.<br /><br />This is the best poem I've read of yours.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3107838361391025851.post-61298510606715773892013-01-16T14:05:24.444-05:002013-01-16T14:05:24.444-05:00Wow. There's a new look here. I like the backg...Wow. There's a new look here. I like the background picture. It's kind of cool. The slightly blurry look draws me in and makes me want to see more. <br /><br />I've never really liked swans. Not since one chased me when I was a kid. I was just trying to give him some food, but he didn't like me and I had to run really fast. Who knew swans could be so mean and so fast:~) My recommendation is to avoid them at all costs!<br /><br />I had fun reading this poem. It fits my quasi-Southern accent very well.<br /><br />Sarahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15995684156785464334noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3107838361391025851.post-9091304534511952002013-01-16T13:28:02.915-05:002013-01-16T13:28:02.915-05:00The glimmers of hope dashed, as the wineglass shat...The glimmers of hope dashed, as the wineglass shatters and the shards cut loost the helium-filled yearnings. And the end is sad. Sad.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12460881702249079009noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3107838361391025851.post-8748802177829616572013-01-16T12:40:34.132-05:002013-01-16T12:40:34.132-05:00The imagery there is wonderful - I can just see it...The imagery there is wonderful - I can just see it.Lynnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13984802196897920610noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3107838361391025851.post-70262062387501264852013-01-16T11:01:56.863-05:002013-01-16T11:01:56.863-05:00nice...great imagery shay...easy to see as i read....nice...great imagery shay...easy to see as i read...the wine glass and the quija...i like the bit of witchery that happens with the return of them....and the swans...its haunting...the back and forth yes/no is telling...and then the final goodbye...a lot of feeling in that...nice shay...Brian Millerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00722940075884718007noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3107838361391025851.post-48398179088047770652013-01-16T10:43:13.557-05:002013-01-16T10:43:13.557-05:00As you intended,I think, the brushes and cottonbal...As you intended,I think, the brushes and cottonballs (stabbing, like freezing sleet) made me think of a figure as vacant and intimidating as the sky, puffed with little white clouds, impersonal, terrifying, remote, disconnected but dangerous and unpredictable as lightning...the rest of the poem also blew me away. The first stanza is one of those perfect parsings of words that sets the scene, and also defines the experience, and every image is weighed just right to glide gracefully, with sinister shadows, into the reader's mind. Swans are always a powerful metaphor in your hands, Shay--never more so than here.hedgewitchhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13090696134322515899noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3107838361391025851.post-27330178635247169722013-01-16T10:28:47.217-05:002013-01-16T10:28:47.217-05:00Very vivid, and great read! Very vivid, and great read! Blogorattihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12821621371176285384noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3107838361391025851.post-77981041203267040682013-01-16T10:19:25.309-05:002013-01-16T10:19:25.309-05:00That opening image is outstanding - I had to conju...That opening image is outstanding - I had to conjure it up in my mind: the board with an upturned wine glass and the sun dazzling on the crystal with a translucent shadow thrown behind.. Then you gave me some swans to work with...Then it turned sad, as your poems so often do. Why does hello always end in goodbye?Kerry O'Connorhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00720862912375945249noreply@blogger.com