civil defense


concussions rain dust
on flowers in a fruit jar
steady in my palm
____

a fauxku for Out Of Standard "Gimme (Fallout) Shelter"

the image is from the movie "10 Cloverfield Lane"


Comments

Jae Rose said…
What a beautiful poem so tender and sweet
Ron. said…
Never heard "fauxku" before, but you carried it off well. Salute!
I'd forgotten about that movie; remember being duly impressed; will definitely re-watch. Thanks!
Sherry Blue Sky said…
Love the fauxku, with its dust raining down on a steady hand........
Helen said…
Fauxku ~~~ needs to be added to the official form list!
tonispencer said…
LOL...fauxku is a word I created for most of the "haiku" written on the net today. It certainly does not need to be added to the forms list as so many out there are either senryu or not haiku.
tonispencer said…
Shay, this is actually a senryu. I love though that you termed it fauxku. This senryu is poignant and sad, almost bittersweet. It brings tears to think of an ending world with flowers in a jar.
Cloudia said…
scent of meaning.....
Isadora Gruye said…
Perfectly framed...deftly written....many thanks for posting to the out of standard!
cosmos cami said…
Perfect imagery. The photo you added wasn't even needed. Your text-painting was excellent.
Old Egg said…
How apt this is for the prompt on Real Toads.
Kim M. Russell said…
The title is clever, Shay – nothing civil about concussions and dust, but how delicate and civil your poem is, those flowers in a fruit jar keeping a survivor sane.
Brendan said…
Grand Funk's version somehow seems an apropos ambience to this fauxku. Whose ghost was riding that ICBM, singing high harmony? Steady, that's the ticket ...
Mama Zen said…
Another sign of the apocalypse . . .
Margaret said…
the last flower, preserved in a fruit jar... Concussions - will we forget where the flower came from? So tightly woven, this revelation...
brudberg said…
Even for the best of prepper the supplies will eventually run out.
There's a sweetness to this poem, despite the situation. Faux-ku is a new one for me!
Kerry O'Connor said…
A most wondrous poem in three lines.. to see the world in a grain of sand.

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