and was eaten by a bird
who then hid in the bush.
I found the bones of a snake
hidden in the bush
and took them home to make a necklace.
I wore the necklace to make you love me
to make you kiss me
which gave me the gift of flight.
Night wrapped around my necklace
which fell from my throat
whole again, escaping,
Mocking me with my own stolen voice
from the bush.
______
I was inspired by Sina Nkosi's fantastic poem "The Snake." Written for Kerry's challenge at Real Toads.
Oh, Shay! Whatever sickness you've got, please infect me! This is breathtaking.
ReplyDeleteAhhhh. Voice, or wings. How often must we choose?
ReplyDeleteI loe this. And the original.
Not one, not two, but three examples to send us all back to school. The simplicity of this really echoes the simplicity--and the darkness-- in the poem by Nkosi, and works so well in both. Here love is the phantom that chases even better than it bites, and it bites to the bone, even when only bones are left.
ReplyDeleteThis is brilliant, Shay. Each time I read one of your poems to the prompt, I think: This is the best yet. What I love about this poem is the sense of a mythology here which is very African in its theme. The Zulu people believe that a snake calls a person in a dream to become a shaman (sangoma). One of the shaman's tasks is to make medicine, love potions etc. This poem is right on the money.
ReplyDeleteIt reads like a fable. Simple and beautiful.
ReplyDeleteInterwoven Intricate In
ReplyDeleteEscher would approve
ALOHA
ComfortSpiral
=^..^=
I was glad to read Kerry's comment. Makes an amazing poem even better (if that's possible)
ReplyDeleteOh, the magic of the snake calling it has to work
ReplyDeleteA circle. Never ending... Love it!
ReplyDeleteIs Sina Nkosi only in 8th grade? Yikes! The necklace in your poem is quite an image.
ReplyDeleteWow. The progression here, from bones to necklace, and then the falling away from your throat, the stolen voice. Incredible writing. One great leap of a poem.
ReplyDeleteSeems like you get an A+ form the teacher... had you any idea of the African theme? I couldn't help but feel I was reading a poem that should be illustrated!
ReplyDeleteI loved the image of snake bones turned talisman. This piece does has the feel of an ancient fable.
ReplyDeletePat
Critter Alley
The bones of a snake... oh my!
ReplyDeleteI saw your comment about Emmylou being such a fan of the Braves - did not know that.
The neatest tidbit I have of her - she is the first cousin of my sister's close friend. Several years ago I met the friend right after Thanksgiving - she had spent it with Emmylou and the extended family. She said Emmylou sang a little Thanksgiving song for them. :)