sky,
earth, sky,
never try
piloting prop
when you're sad and high.
last night i dreamed that i
cleared my head, got out of bed,
and walked down the wing to kiss you.
never take random pills with warm wine--
sky, earth, sky, fall, roll, rise, you, us, i.
______
an Etheree for Play It Again, Toads.
Well slam-diggity. This is one of my favorites. Super hot and feisty.
ReplyDelete"never try
piloting prop
when you're sad and high"
Sounds like it turned out to be a pretty interesting ride to me. Just not too many pills ... you know? The headache alone could kill you.
I love the way this makes me feel motion. . . like the roll of a plane.
ReplyDeleteSuperb!! Loved how this poem made me feel.. like a roller coaster ride :D
ReplyDeleteBeautifully penned :D
Lots of love,
Sanaa
WOWZERS!!!!! I so totally love this poem!
ReplyDeleteI keep coming back to read it again and again. That's a pretty good compliment, isn't it? ;)
ReplyDeleteoh what a dream! cleverly done
ReplyDeleteI love the floaty feel of your words~ A dreamscape feeling, so well done and fun to read~
ReplyDeleteI keep re-reading too. It's satisfying and intriguing at once.
ReplyDeleteAn enjoyable and delightful read, nice!
ReplyDeleteLove the motion in this and the last line is wonderful
ReplyDeleteAWww - good advice, although I love dreams of flying. The rhyme is so satisifying, and the progression in the last line really sums it up.
ReplyDeleteLess
ReplyDeletefor you,
is so much more! xx
This is really lovely. I like the way the poem stretches out like the wing of a plane, and the second to last line is excellent advice!
ReplyDeletethat's really cool.
ReplyDeletelove the final line most...
ReplyDeleteThis is a really hard form I think, very easy to lose the thread, but you make it work overtime for you, especially exploiting the random feel of it in that last line. Agree with Kerry on the walking the wing part, and also love the incidental rhyme you casually delight us with till you abandon it to throw a sharp unrhymed uppercut. You managed to say twice as much with half as many words as usual here--love it.
ReplyDeleteIt is tough walking on wings when you mix pills and wine. Love this!
ReplyDeleteI really enjoy the rhyme here and the almost hypnotic way it unfolds - and the last line is such a joy to say!
ReplyDelete