Reanimated Lavender Granola Switchblade Nun rides again.

Friday, November 10, 2017

Reincarnated Grandmothers

Reincarnated grandmothers
have had it with knitting--
fuck that shit.
Now it's our turn to not visit you.
Check us out.
Send us money on our birthdays
cos we wanna drink it up and to hell with thank-you's.
Watch us steal your bae,
troll your page,
lie, cuss, catfish.
You want cookies? 
Buy a bakery. 
______

 A 55 for my BFF.
 
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12 comments:

  1. Magaly GuerreroNovember 10, 2017 at 9:42 AM

    After a fashion, everybody should bake their own damn cookie.

    ReplyDelete
  2. XNovember 10, 2017 at 10:33 AM

    Ha. Nice snark.
    My grandmother turned 96 this week.
    I did call her. And will go see her this weekend.
    Perhaps I should take her cookies.

    It is sad that at the end of life we are left alone to die, forgotten. Days at gramma's house on the weekend were amazing growing up.
    We need to remember that.

    Thanks Shay.

    ReplyDelete
  3. AngieNovember 10, 2017 at 10:57 AM

    This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  4. hedgewitchNovember 10, 2017 at 1:51 PM

    This totally cracked me up, girl--I absolutely love the attitude you bring to the 55, and so would Galen have. "Now it's our turn to not visit you...." That is EXACTLY how I feel about it myself. Thanks for making me laugh out loud, Shay, and for making the weekend a lot more kickass.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Susie ClevengerNovember 10, 2017 at 1:52 PM

    Yes, dammit! You want a cookie, find a bakery while I steal your cake. :)

    ReplyDelete
  6. Sherry Blue SkyNovember 10, 2017 at 4:54 PM

    Cackling........wish they WOULD send me cash, lol...........

    ReplyDelete
  7. Other MaryNovember 10, 2017 at 5:46 PM

    You tell 'em! And don't forget to stay up late worrying about grandma too!

    ReplyDelete
  8. cricketNovember 10, 2017 at 8:32 PM

    my grams woulda loved this ~

    ReplyDelete
  9. HerotomostNovember 11, 2017 at 7:02 AM

    I always tell our kids when they are disgusted with our non parental lifestyle that I ain’t ready for the rocker yet! They are sometimes disgruntled with our antics.

    ReplyDelete
  10. brudbergNovember 11, 2017 at 8:58 AM

    The best thing you can do is to cook for her... we do that with my mother in law once a week...

    Think she would like this.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Sioux RoslawskiNovember 11, 2017 at 10:14 AM

    Maybe there should be a "Bad Grammy" movie? ;)

    ReplyDelete
  12. Sarah RussellNovember 11, 2017 at 11:05 PM

    Love this!

    ReplyDelete

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