Reincarnated Grandmothers

Reincarnated grandmothers
have had it with knitting--
fuck that shit.
Now it's our turn to not visit you.
Check us out.
Send us money on our birthdays
cos we wanna drink it up and to hell with thank-you's.
Watch us steal your bae,
troll your page,
lie, cuss, catfish.
You want cookies? 
Buy a bakery. 

A 55 for my BFF.


Magaly Guerrero said…
After a fashion, everybody should bake their own damn cookie.
X said…
Ha. Nice snark.
My grandmother turned 96 this week.
I did call her. And will go see her this weekend.
Perhaps I should take her cookies.

It is sad that at the end of life we are left alone to die, forgotten. Days at gramma's house on the weekend were amazing growing up.
We need to remember that.

Thanks Shay.
Angie said…
This comment has been removed by the author.
hedgewitch said…
This totally cracked me up, girl--I absolutely love the attitude you bring to the 55, and so would Galen have. "Now it's our turn to not visit you...." That is EXACTLY how I feel about it myself. Thanks for making me laugh out loud, Shay, and for making the weekend a lot more kickass.
Susie Clevenger said…
Yes, dammit! You want a cookie, find a bakery while I steal your cake. :)
Sherry Blue Sky said…
Cackling........wish they WOULD send me cash, lol...........
Other Mary said…
You tell 'em! And don't forget to stay up late worrying about grandma too!
cricket said…
my grams woulda loved this ~
Herotomost said…
I always tell our kids when they are disgusted with our non parental lifestyle that I ain’t ready for the rocker yet! They are sometimes disgruntled with our antics.
brudberg said…
The best thing you can do is to cook for her... we do that with my mother in law once a week...

Think she would like this.
Sioux Roslawski said…
Maybe there should be a "Bad Grammy" movie? ;)