Friday, November 24, 2017

The Crow In My Eye

There's a crow in my eye
remembering you.
I could be smiling or
lying or
out of my mind,
but the crow won't forget
your face, and he won't be kind.

You frustrate him, 
by law of similars.
My crow likes trinkets, toys,
and fresh-killed love
or such like that my crow thinks of.
_______

a 55 for my BFF.

10 comments:

Kerry O'Connor said...

Hi Shay's crow - meet Kerry's raven. I'm sure you two will get along famously.

said...

I love this --- especially:

"You frustrate him, 
by law of similars.
My crow likes trinkets, toys,
and fresh-killed love"

hedgewitch said...

I love how you lament your lack of inspiration, and then pop out a gem like this! You exemplify here everything the 55 does best--impact through compression, discriminating word choice, and the power of an image reduced to its basics--all with a great richness that sacrifices nothing in the way of nuance or subtlety. Every line takes its toll. And, btw, I can so relate--I have had crows in my eyes for years. Thanks SO much for playing, and for kicking total weekend ass.

X said...

Intriguing. I like the use of the crow here. The symbolism of the crow is often that of individuality, which might definitely rub up against anyone invading or competing with that. The crow is also favored for communication and wisdom.

Perhaps through the law of similar it realizes that the other "you" and it was not that much different.

Fresh killed love. Ha. There you have it.

Sherry Blue Sky said...

WOW! Also, YES! Nailed it. A poem that sticks in one's head like a barb. Or a beak.

Cloudia said...

Well crafted with a final line that rises even above.

cricket said...

I always say hello to crows

Sanaa Rizvi said...

Whoaa!!💞 This is beautifully haunting!! Especially like; "I could be smiling or lying or out of my mind, but the crow won't forget your face, and he won't be kind." Fabulous 55!💞

Anonymous said...

snotty ole crow. i know someone who can take care of that fer ya

Marian said...

Awwww.