Between dawn and regret for the night;
There is a point of fascination
Where the black lace touches the white.
Tell me no, and I will go
Deep in the brambles, bleeding;
Tell me yes, you love me best
And I'll be your saint interceding.
for A Word With Laurie at Real Toads
both pictures from weheartit.com
There is a sweetness here, but something sharper underneath.
ReplyDeleteAnd this, without Bolthouse? ;)
"There is a point of fascination
ReplyDeleteWhere the black lace touches the white" ... Sheesh. No kidding.
"Tell me no, and I will go
Deep in the brambles, bleeding" ... Beautiful and sad.
And what if I tell you no but mean yes? What will you do then? (Shhh. Don't tell me now; save your answer for your next poem.)
;)
I like this one.
ReplyDeleteI always love it when you work with rhyme, because you never let it even begin to feel forced or obvious, and here is no exception--simple, elegiac almost, fragile-feeling statements that are knotted indivisibly together like lace neither black nor white--maybe ecru, the color of the flesh that longs and suffers and rejoices.
ReplyDeleteVery lovely verse!
ReplyDeleteMadeleine Begun Kane
This is perfection.
ReplyDeleteI echo Mama Zen. Each stanza is a beautiful little creation, and I like the contrast between them. I smiled to noted the heightened effect of the rhyme - made everything so crisp.
ReplyDeleteYou are as powerful with simplicity as you are with verbosity (is that a word?) This just made me sigh with the pure genius of your words... (and I love that little top! :)
ReplyDeleteBeautiful. Sigh.
ReplyDeleteLove the contrasts of emotions and colors in each stanza ~
ReplyDeleteFor such a simple format, this piece rolls so nicely off the tongue. Added to my short list of favorites by you. *Applause!*
ReplyDeleteShort, sweet, and a touch sad. I love it. (I like your new Emmylou photo better-looks more natural!)
ReplyDeleteIt's very touching. :) The black lace touching the white seems to sum up life.
ReplyDelete