Budget-Tel Hell

We were too stoned to get home, so
we checked into the local Budget-Tel, room 13.
The guy was pissed we woke him up
and he gave us a crappy room with a tv with a busted screen.

My old man said I made him mad like always,
and swung the towel bar at me so I called my friend
Dotty to come get high with us cos the stupid fuck might really kill me
once he finds out I took 20 dollars from the glove box in his pickup truck.

Well, Dotty came and dumbass didn't want to give her any dope
but I kicked his shin and told him not to be such a dickhead for once
and he slugged me but not too hard while Dotty went in his pocket for the bag.
How does a guy like me--says dumbass--end up in a Budget-tel with you two cunts?

I got right and was wondering crazy shit like would the bedspread burn
and I held my lighter to it but it only smoked a little bit. 
Dotty said Jesus what an ugly picture but when dumbass threw the lamp at my head
it smashed the frame and Dotty said it's an improvement. What ugly shit!

I fell asleep but dumbass kicked me off the bed and said where's my twenty?
so I bit his leg and he yelled and lost his balance and fell through the fucking window
so somebody called the cops and Dotty booked and there I was
high as fuck and under arrest at the stupid Budget-Tel, now ain't that just my luck?
________

for Artistic Impressions With Margaret--Alcohol Inks

 

 

New Garden

My robot fucked the 7-11 chick--
she'd guessed the access code.
Amid disassembled hardware, I located and removed
my emotional investment.

New garden. No succulents. 
I bang the yield in walls with a hammer.
I erect abstract sculpture the neighbors hate.

I go on, exploded,
hating inevitable outcomes
and the rattle of my seed-pod heart. 
______

A flash 55 for my BFF.

image: from the sci-fi movie "Ex Machina" 

Skully

When I first met Skully,
I was an ingenue in a silly fragile plastic body--
a nursery flat, a starter bed,
not yet Anne Of Queer Gables
magnificently not giving a shit.

Back then,
I believed that Skully was stuffed like a bell pepper,
jammed to bursting with thoughts, dreams and 
wisdom on every subject;
I didn't know, as we lay together under the ceiling fan,
that he was as vacant and distant as outer space.

He PEZed me kisses, bought me roomsful of useless junk,
and twisted me silly like a bonsai tree.
I let him.
Daydream starlets and archery targets both have curves,
and sit still for the incoming--
I spent a decade with Skully that way,
as if I'd done it with a porcupine and was proud of the damage.

Now, he sits like an unfortunate date brought to dinner--
big-eyed as a girl, smiling too much,
and adding nothing to the conversation.
Still, I can't bear to throw him out,
and so the dogs lug him around like a trophy,
scoring and striping him with their joyful teeth marks
and losing his mandible under the fold-out sofa.

My girlfriends tolerate him.
After all, he's dead, and won't start any stupid crap about threesomes.
The next door kids ask for him sometimes,
and they bowl him at empty pop bottles in the driveway.
I confess, though,
that late at night, when it's stormy, and I'm alone,
I pause before bouncing him down the basement stairs, and I say,

"Thank you, Skully,
for keeping me from having to be alone
in the years before I bloomed into my need for heart, flesh, soul,
and not just solid bone."
Then I lay one on his grinning kisser
and even add a little tongue
just to tease him
for the lack that made me leave him like a southbound bird.
_______

"pop" is a Michiganism for what I think most people call "soda".  
 
  

Pop Quiz

This test is compulsory.
It is a timed test.
We started without you.

The first and last questions count the most.
What is your name?
Please put it at the top of your test.
Hint: this may be a trick question.

Let's try a story problem:
If Jane has three apples,
and gives one to Billy,
why would she do that?

Suppose that Billy takes another of Jane's apples,
and gives it to Mary;
now deal with each one's pride, happiness, anger.
You may not leave the problem blank.

Extra credit:
Why Jane?
Why apples?

Section three.
Do you play a musical instrument?
Have you ever wanted to play a musical instrument?
Which one?
Here is a different one.
Start playing.

Does it bother you if people watch, say things, judge?
While you're doing that,
here is one other person,
two,
several.
All of them want something from you.
Keep playing.

What is your best subject?
Please complete all the other subjects first.

Now, answer the following questions "YES" or "NO".
What is the best approach to doing well on this test?
How have previous experiences affected your answers?
Where do you see yourself in ten years?
What do you remember most about your parents?
How do you feel about your spouse?
What have you kept from them?
What things are truly "yours"?
What will you do when you leave here today?
Will it be today?

Final section.
Remember that the first and last questions count the most.
Do you feel that the test was unclear,
or even impossible?
Did you feel that you were given enough time to decide your answers?
Were you doing the whole thing for someone else,
or for yourself only?
While taking this test, did you experience
rage?
gratitude?
exhaustion?
wonder?
love?
amusement?
despair?
indifference?
Did you want to quit before the test was finished?
Did you quit?
Would you recommend this test to others?
Do you trust the examiner(s)?
Do you feel that the test contained an ultimate "point"?

Do you care that the test will continue on without you?
Did you find the whole thing overwhelming and unfair?

Final question:
Do you think that makes you unique?
_______

for Poetry Jam, "yes or no"

image found on weheartit.com.

 

Kind

The snake curled around my arm is not jewelry.
Go ahead; touch it.

Oh dear. I should have warned you
that I sometimes give terrible advice.

Never mind. Let me suck out the venom,
even if never quite enough--

and if my lips taste bitter as I kiss you, darling,
I apologize.

Please, while there's still time,
be kind
by whispering me your forgiveness--
my love so saturnine.
_______