Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Girl Scouts On Acid




She's like girl scouts on acid

With that

Sweet face

Innocent face


She's like love in the House of Mirrors

If she's bent, fool,

You'll bend, too.


Oh, and you want to climb her like a vine

Don't you?

You want to kiss her and fall down the elevator shaft--

Fall down

Fast.


She's like girl scouts on acid

With that sweet face

Innocent face


She's like love in the House of Mirrors

Gone

Without

A trace.

20 comments:

writerwoman said...

Oh this is just the style of poetry I love!

Its lyrical, a little bitter and brusing, but so beautiful. This could make a fantastic start to a song.

Jannie said...

Enjoying going through your archives.
J.
xo

Florencia Suarez A. said...

..gone without a trace...just perfect!!

Abin Chakraborty said...

should they linger around at times instead of vanishing, shooting, stabbing etc? not always, you know, but just once in a while?
as enjoyable and spunky as always.

Ravenblack said...

Girls like her won't be sticking around those who can only think of getting to her, I guess. I agree with Writerwoman, this could work as a song. :) Fun to read.

- Ravenblack
http://theotherdayplace.blogspot.com

Herotomost said...

Its the game thats so enticing...and when they know how to play it....and they stumble across a fool (someomnne like me maybe..lol)its all over but the cryin'.

Kerry O'Connor said...

This is a very enigmatic character you have created. You do have a gift for writing about surreally believable people, and breathing life into them, and a back history that is just out of sight.

razzamadazzle said...

Awesome! The idea of the girl scout on acid certainly paints a picture!

Mark Windham said...

yes she is, and yes I did, once some time ago...

Sherry Blue Sky said...

Fantastic poem: "Gone Without A trace." Love the fun house mirror.

Shawna said...

I like how you begin this with "girl scouts on acid" ... but by the time you repeat it toward the end, we have a completely different understanding of the phrase. It's not the "girl scout" who seems like she's dropping acid; it's the guy who feels as such when he's around her (or when she's on his mind). Nothing makes sense; everything is a hallucination, reality/surreality a blitz-blend (to use Kerry's word).

Very effective use of italics and "House of Mirrors" to illustrate your point.

You should write one about how she feels, being acid and all.

rosemarymint.wordpress.com

hedgewitch said...

Is love ever NOT in the House of Mirrors? If so, I haven't managed to find it. I love the italics here--which point to appearances, as well as the mirrors, not being the same as the underlying reality. And the elevator shaft.

Fireblossom said...

Guy, Shawna? Au contraire.

Heaven said...

Girl scout on acid...that is some image ~

Shawna said...

Sorry, Shay. Straight-girl mistake. It won't happen again. ;)

What threw me was the word "fool." I would never use that word to describe a woman.

rosemarymint.wordpress.com

Fireblossom said...

I used "fool" to go with "You'll" and "too", but you're right, it does sound guy-ish.

wkkortas said...

As others have said, this piece is positively lyrical. It literally begs to be put to music.

Isadora Gruye said...

cute!!!!!

Fred Rutherford said...

Very cool, definitely lyrical, would make a great song. Love the house of mirrors stanza, very neat. Thanks

Margaret said...

I'm a little creeped out by the use of "girl scout" only because of all the creeps preying on young girls these days... (and a recent too close call with a family that went through this) BUT I do get what you were getting at with the image...

Now, House of Mirrors to describe love, (especially teenage "love") is ingenious! I see it and hear about it a lot these days... Will I survive? :)