You, with the hard hubcap eyes.
And oh, what a big mandible you have!
The better to grind me with,
As if I were a green blade of grass.
I'll admit,
I'm a little bit twisty--
A little bit up in the air...
But I learned from the birds, the benefit of a little bit of tilt
In spotting what I need to see.
Were you still speaking, darling?
No. Up here!
I'm on the cross beam, with my toes pointing south, my nose headed north,
And my heart going a mile a minute, all the time.
I've got to spread my wings.
I know! I talk such shit sometimes!
It's only to lull you,
Little bug,
Only a colorful mock-embrace, headed your way.
Only dizzy me,
Not falling, but swooping
Down to your level, love,
For this one
And only time.
For Kenia's Challenge at Real Toads. I hope this is something resembling what you wanted, Kenia. But if not, I can hang this up in litigation for years! :-P
Are you teasing? ;-)
ReplyDeleteWow, how insightful.
ReplyDeleteSuch attributes, metaphorically speaking.
This piece is exactly why I enjoy you so much.
By the way, beautiful pics of you as a human with wings and the one of your feminine gender.
I agree that your style has much in common with the precepts of futurism (as I understand them at the most basic level via wiki). Particularly when it comes to the concise and exacting mature of your analogies, which are always out there (on a limb, so to speak) and you never use one word more than is necessary.
ReplyDeleteThis poem is a great response to the prompt.
I have to say, I read the prompt, and I have a hard time grasping the things about the style desired that make it unique--but not about this poem, which presents its images as a conversation with life, and winds. writhes and soars through its message with ease. I esp like the picture I get of the duality of the bird on the wire, toes one way, nose another, deciding how best to pounce? or whether to move on to something more fruitful? (And, of course, I love the closing shot of my shoes and broom--who among the staff did you bribe to photograph them when I wasn't looking?)
ReplyDeletewhen i read this, it has the soundtrack of richard and linda thompson. (that's a compliment.)
ReplyDelete"But I learned from the birds, the benefit of a little bit of tilt
ReplyDeleteIn spotting what I need to see."
Oh, but that is the awesome! Love the tone of this.
Lovely futuristic analogy here... I like the words you chose, esp. flight, twist, dizzy... and hubcap eyes!
ReplyDeleteBrilliant! I love it.
ReplyDeleteDo cats fly? Catcalls maybe, cattiness on the wing ... Anyhoo you gave "flighty" a mighty whipping. How you managed to sneak off (in the end pic) with Hedgie's aerial armor I'd like to know; sure would make my daily commute easier.
ReplyDeleteWonderfully done, Shay, with the emphasis on wonder, but "fully" applies, too.
ReplyDeleteK
This is great...I was lost in the how to approach the form...as of yet I haven't attempted it...but you did a marvelous job..I am in awe of your talent.
ReplyDeleteWhat a flight indeed! Wonderful as always! :-)
ReplyDeleteHee hee hee. You definitely sound like a bird who knows how to swoop down, eat a bug, and float back up without that speedy heart missing a single beat.
ReplyDeleteIf futurist poetry is introducing unexpected elements, I think it is definitely what you already do naturally.
~Shawna
rosemarymint.wordpress.com
Playful and genius.
ReplyDeleteGreat! I love the birds as teacher.
ReplyDeleteWe can definitely learn things from the birds. (And I wished I understood what is meant by futuristic poetry!)
ReplyDeleteLove the way you wove all things bird-like into this piece. Very nice!
ReplyDeletePat
Critter Alley
Somehow, I felt windblown as I savored this poem. How did you make that happen?
ReplyDeleteI liked this A lot.
ReplyDeleteYou need to give me flying lessons! Love this.
ReplyDeleteReminds me of being "out of time" so to speak. How God (or whatever you want to call "him") is not limited to "our time and space". Although I don't think of Him as a Raven or bird swooping down upon us "bugs". LOL
ReplyDeleteI'm sure my juvenile analysis is not what you intended, but that is where my mind went with this...
you tear apart every form you attempt and put it back together Shay-style ~ ALWAYS so much more. {personally, i think you just like to show off.}
ReplyDeletethis has to be one of my all-time favorites!
where do you keep all your talent locked away? can i borrow the key? pleeeeeease?!
♥