Sunday, August 3, 2014

Quiet On Set

A career in opera doesn't always work out for a girl,
and so then she has to fall back on Plan B.

The land around here looks like it's been through God's own laundry press,
and it only rains every Fourth of July,
leaving the year-rounders feeling itchy and bad-tempered.

This is no place for Bo Peep, with a pink bow in her hair.
Nobody wants to hear Puccini,
but there's a snake handler under every tent.

Into this maelstrom of dust and cowshit comes Our Heroine,
by means of Plymouth automobile,
ready for a different kind of star turn.

Sick of marrying the same guy over and over,
she sets her happy ass down in front of the big yellow ball of the setting sun,
and memorizes her lines,
which are, basically,
the sort of stuff some screenwriter in L.A. thinks a girl like her might say.

Well, who cares?
Her leading man is gay anyway,
and she's doing the job for a flat fee, 
so she doesn't give a flying fuck at a rolling doughnut whether it tanks or is a smash.

Tomorrow she'll rope the young actor from Indiana,
and by the time the stars come out,
he'll be rattling off nonsense about the future, and men on the moon.
She'll have shown him,
first hand and--though softly--right in his ear
how well she can yodel,
among other wondrous things.
_______

Mixing fact with bullshit for Magpie #231.

 

25 comments:

TexWisGirl said...

another great romp!

Gail said...

I think your captured the essence of Liz,

hedgewitch said...

Yeah, it ain't easy being a cowgirl, especially if you like manicures. But it's always good to know a few rope tricks, and yodeling...well, it's a skill not enough people appreciate. Loved this little excursion into the Wild Wild West, Shay.

Hamish Gunn said...

Good fun, great wordplay, and some thought n the female condition, all in one..well done

Helen said...

You lassoed this one good, Ms. Shay!

Kathe W. said...

excellently crafted and the Emmy Lou music is a cherry on the top.

Kerry O'Connor said...

This is a wonderful snippet of an almost forgotten lifestyle, so charmingly told.

Kay said...

just amazing words..x

Mama Zen said...

I love me some facts and bullshit on a Sunday afternoon!

Arushi Ahuja said...

powerful woman indeed!! maybe it reflects a bit of you i am guessing! ? the strngth described herein the determination of the girl!!

Other Mary said...

Great take - fresh as always.

Sioux said...

Prairie patties and fact that perfectly match the photo.

An excellent Sunday supper...

bj said...

♪♫...and if that mockingbird don't sing, daddy's gonna buy me a
diamond ring...♪♫♫

Kathryn Dyche Dechairo said...

nobody mixes fact and bullshit in quite the way you do, love it.

carol l mckenna said...

Love the 'mix' of words so visual and dynamic ~ Visiting from AsTheCrackerHeadCrumbles: A Sunday Drive ~ enjoy ~

artmusedog and carol (A Creative Harbor)

Shadow said...

This lady is so well-known. She lived her life on her terms. Like your take...

Tess Kincaid said...

Oh yeah...my daughter started out with a career in opera...now on plan B...

Daryl said...

sounds like there might need to be a plan C

grapeling said...

those whispering yodels ~

Eddie Bluelights said...

Loved it and really made me laugh:
Leading man is gay anyway - poor Rock!
Sick of marrying the same guy over and over,
Poor Richard . . . .
Really great take . . . I did a short humorous one as well . . :) Eddie

Jennifer Chandler said...

Loved this! I like the word pictures and the attitude of this "leading lady". ~ Jen

Karen S. said...

Lovely! I know those plans B and on and on! Great take- enjoying the light side of things- after camping!

Carrie Van Horn said...

Yodeling can get you anywhere........:-))

Helen Bauch McHargue said...

I am in utter awe. Words (have you taken them all?)
escape me.

Hamish Gunn said...

Sick of marrying the same guy....great lines in that tale...