The Realtor

Just a little sprucing up
is all this place needs.
Just some spray cleaner and big black bible to wave around,
and everything here could be restored to its original middling banality.

Come in, come stagger down the staircase clutching your left arm.
We'll throw a party, 
invite the mayor,
the cognoscenti,
and EMS.

Feel free to collapse on the piano bench.
Just blow that dust right off the keys and play!
I've always liked Percy Grainger's Country Gardens,
but if you don't know it, just bang away at the keys with your elbows
and we'll manage a dance.

Peach, I can see by the look on your face
that you think this is wasted effort.
Trust me. Just spit on the sleeve of your dress
and use it to wipe a circle of clarity on one of these lovely old windows.
Let the half-light and fog in,
as you fall to the floor in one of your fits.

I've been at this business for a while,
and I always bring spare keys and smelling salts.
Look at the ad!
"Motivated seller, no reasonable offer refused".
Let me call their agent.
We can be at her office in half an hour--
me at my professional best,
and you giddy and rambling in light restraints.

Then, in a week or two,
after the fire, but before the funeral,
I will breeze in with a housewarming gift especially for the new mistress--
Beelzebub on a chain,
ringing a bicycle bell and
asking, despite his slight speech impediment, which room is to be his.

A deficient effort for the Sunday mini-challenge at Real Toads, -- " This apparent deficiency is purposely used by the poet to produce an intended effect—the reader's uncomfortable feeling of uncertainty and harshness that corresponds to the tormented attitude of the lyrical voice and to the passionate character of the poet's worldview.--and a comment on empire-building, given the current state of events around the world.  


Hannah said…
Twisted and dark scene especially with the image that you've provided as well, FB!! You have such a fullness of ambiance and character here and I love the part about the circle of clarity...the spotlight that provides upon her fit...excellent writing, Shay!! :)
Grace said…
I like the deficient effort very much, smiles ~ The whole scenario specially the ending stanza of the housewarming gift gave me goosebumps ~

Thanks for linking up with Sunday's challenge Shay ~ Have a good weekend ~
brudberg said…
The harshness in this commentary is staggering.. I try to paint the two people in my mind and I almost come up with the two aspects of the same person... The inclusion of the funeral in the last stanza has the same sense of surreal magic as Garcia Marquez texts... I read your poem several times.
TexWisGirl said…
i saw johnny depp as the realtor, myself...
Sioux Roslawski said…
THIS is a deficient effort? I wish I could write in such a deficient manner.
Sumana Roy said…
this reads like a dramatic monologue and a fun read specially the last few lines...
ZQ said…
Good Grief! That was as weird as it was great. Excellent piece.
Kerry O'Connor said…
You have never shied away from creating a sense of discomfort in your poetry - the tiger on the leash, the saintly demons, and the demons themselves. There is a boldness to your pieces which forces the reader to reassess what they knew about life and poetry. In itself, this tale of terrible incarceration taps into all I know about misogyny and "woman's troubles". Always a devil near by to blame.
Marion said…
Tee-hee-hee. I see Jessica Lange in American Horror Story...the one in New Orleans. Excellent, Shay!! xo
Maude Lynn said…
"after the fire, but before the funeral"

Envy may kill me.
Sherry Blue Sky said…
I loved those lines especially too - this poem is even edgier than usual which takes it into the realm of impossibly brilliant. Oh my God. What would I do if I couldnt read you?
Susie Clevenger said…
This is so delightfully twisted..Just this evening I had to unfriend someone on Facebook who threw me under Satan's bus....long story, but she didn't like my dislike for organized religion.
Shadow said…
Picture and words mesh into a chilling tale! Love it!
Anonymous said…
I love the last four lines, and the part about stumbling down the stairs clutching your left arm (double meaning in "left"). And then, suggesting she play the piano one-handed, with one arm maybe hurt.

Love the circle of clarity. If only.

"and you giddy and rambling in light restraints" ... Fantastic. You know, this piece makes me think of the show, Asylum. Like the speaker works in a mental facility and is having a bit of fun at the new patient's expense. :)

I don't find this in any way deficient.
Anonymous said…
Yes, to what Marion said! That's exactly what I was picturing! But a different season, same actress though.
Helen said…
I LOVE 'wipe a circle of clarity' ~ spit ~ if only.
You are amazing ...