Some sharks move to suburbia.
They are mutant land sharks, able to breath and speak in their
strange, halting pidgin.
Their spawn, er, kids sign up for Little League
and eat burgers at picnic tables after the games--
A lot of burgers.
Okay all the burgers.
At little Maria's birthday party, there is a pinata.
One of the shark kids bursts up from the lawn,
opens its gaping maw,
and consumes it whole, along with much of a maple tree.
Version 1) Maria runs inside, crying.
Version 2) Maria starts writing "Mrs, Maria Shark" over and over
in her school notebook.
Some customs elude the sharks.
Someone brings over a bundt cake as a welcome gesture.
Mrs. Shark tries for an air kiss on the cheek but sends the woman to the hospital.
It is awkward for everyone and permanent for the neighbor.
The sharks notice that PTA mothers' and golfing dads' smiles
have turned to scowls.
Country Club sponsorships dry up.
The sharks make a holiday visit to the community pool and everyone runs away screaming.
The sharks start wearing disguises in the grocery store and at the bank.
"I am a harmless minnow," says one shark
from a few rows of dagger-like teeth.
During a visit to a local gallery, all the sharks wear berets
and funny eyeglass masks.
No one is fooled.
Realizing that things have gone too far for remedy,
the sharks shrug, as sharks will,
and solve everything by eating the school principal,
the HOA president, and the local chief of police,
all in a single afternoon.
They pack up all their stuff and return to the sea
where people are not so judgy and unforgiving.
They playfully sink a fishing boat and eat all the occupants, fish, tackle, and the mast.
They are home. Their stomachs are full. All is well.
Brody and Hooper may kiss their fantastic finned butts.
________
Music: Baby Shark (You're welcome!)
