Hi. I'm the new girl.
Are you gonna finish that salad?
I heard about this take-out place, and they made salads from lettuce that grew where all these deer were coming by and crapping on it, and people got, like, botulism or something. They puked and had to go in the hospital and stuff. It was gross.
So is it working?
Well, I just assumed you're dieting. Aren't you? I never diet. I can, like, OD on chocolate pie til I'm cross eyed and never gain an ounce. I'd kill myself if I was fat. I mean, that's just me. I like fat people. They're like, jolly, and don't care what they wear, and I think that's very freeing.
Is this a picture of your husband? Wow, he looks a lot younger than you! He's really handsome. Been married long?
Does he work here? Hey, it was just a question.
I love your hair. That retro look is so popular now.
So, you probably know all the ins and outs, right? If I had been here half as long as you, I'd be running the place. But they'd probably fire me for vericose veins or something. Ha! That was a joke!
Wow, you're really not that jolly, are you?
Well, of course you've got work to do! I thought I could help you. What's this junk? Oh, was that in some kind of special order or something? Oops!
Hey look, I'm sorry. Seriously. Let's be friends. I'd really like us to--
Oh, that's my phone. I have to take this.
Sorry that took so long. I think I've got a cramp in my ass from sitting on your desk!
Well, I better run. Oh my gosh, you have such a pretty smile! Anyhoo, don't be a stranger, Tammy. Okay, sorry, Tanya. New girl, what can I say?
(walking away) What a bitch!
for trifecta week 30. 314 words. key word "new."