Reanimated Lavender Granola Switchblade Nun rides again.

Wednesday, October 21, 2015

My Consultant

My Consultant says you suck and that I was right all along.
Oh gosh,
I really like My Consultant.

When you are talking, knotting together all of your opinions
into a rope ladder to nowhere,
My Consultant jabbers pleasantly in my ear, thank God.

At Area 51,
My Consultant was there.
In the Bonnie & Clyde death car,
My Consultant was there,
in the chamber of his heart, in the untouched beauty of her hair.

What? What?
Are you still talking? I'm sorry.
My Consultant is telling me about how to get rid of aphids.

You may think I'm nuts.
You may think a lot of things, and blab about each one until Jesus pukes.
Kiss my ass and watch it pass, I'm on my way to sweeter things.

If there's anything else,
go to the house where we first met, curl up as small as you can get,
and take it up with My Defender,
My Cat-Faced Commander from Outer Space. 

Accept her mercy.
Be humble, my froward shithead. 
Be silent and receive her grace.

Image at top is Cristina Scabbia.


hedgewitch said...

Every turn of this is a quick and constructing turn of the screw--satire, contempt, despair, reverence even--amazing how you work in all sorts of themes that ought to jangle like that kind of handbag someone is using to carry their whole life around in--but the jangly becomes the sweetest music of self and sense for me. Love this one, Shay.



brudberg said...

I'm always scared to comment on this.. really like the layers in here... though i guess I might be aphideous :-)

Susan said...

You are lucky to have a loyal Consultant to accompany you and record your chronicles. To have confidence to bite like this is wonderful!

Shadow said...

I don't not wish to get on the wrong side of that tongue!?


Sheesh. She's gorgeous. I'm listening to her music right now.

Fireblossom said...

^^ She is truly too cool for Duckburg.

Fireblossom said...

Bjorn, you are not an aphid!

Sherry Blue Sky said...

"What? What? Are you still talking?" I have to remember that line, LOL. I especially like your labels: "shut big fat mouf".

Blogoratti said...

A good consultant is everything.

Rosemary Nissen-Wade said...

A Consultant AND a Defender (cat-faced to boot) – how blessed are you? Favourite phrase: 'until Jesus pukes'. I'm adopting it forthwith! Rather fond of 'my froward shithead' too.

You always rejuvenate my appreciation of what poetry can do.

Cloudia said...

so strong and individual!



Sioux Roslawski said...

vox dea? I'm curious...

How do I get a consultant like that?

Anonymous said...

At least the consultant is interesting-keep her.

Maude Lynn said...

Can I borrow your consultant?

Kerry O'Connor said...

So long as the consultant is in one's corner and not one's own worst enemy.

Buddah Moskowitz said...

I once lived in a house with seven consultants: Jiffy, Natasha, Laurie, Monty, Little Jo, Crossed-Eyed Sam and Petey. Each one had their own wisdom, and they frequently agreed that I was generally incompetent, but I could dish out the food, so I had some value.

Loved this, la l Mosk