You wanted
To break my cold reserve
To be a flame on the frozen stream
I wanted
To protect my stillness
To be snow in the presence of May
Charming one
You remind me of me
When I was hopeful and still believed
I thank you
For the moment's respite
When you touched my sleep with honeyed light.
______
For Dverse MTB "A Lover as Second Nature" hosted by Laura B.
Music: Jai Jagdeesh In Dreams
Shay, you spirited me to fantasyland ... pure and simple. This is beautiful AND you certainly mastered the form.
ReplyDeleteSwoon. I looked at this challenge and thought it truly seemed challenging to come up with something smooth within the structure and rules of the form and theme. But, you've done it just so beautifully.
ReplyDeleteaddressing the lover directly works so well with this form and the contrasting imagery so profound - it has the lightest most poignant touch of regret
ReplyDeleteSad that it was merely a moment's respite in the honeyed light...
ReplyDeleteSuch perfect, lovely words. This poem resonates with me, for sure. The reserve, the protection of one's tender heart. I love the gift given in the closing lines - when "you touched my sleep with honeyed light." Wow. Knocks my socks off.
ReplyDeleteBrilliant beginning, with both wishes and the contrast between cold and warmth,
ReplyDeleteLove those first two stanzas.
ReplyDeleteI love the chill of the first two stanzas, Shay, especially the image of ‘a flame on the frozen stream’ and the thought of being ‘snow in the presence of May’.
ReplyDeleteI love the chill of the first two stanzas, Shay, especially the image of ‘a flame on the frozen stream’ and the thought of being ‘snow in the presence of May’.
ReplyDeleteLeading up to that beautiful last line - Ain
ReplyDeleteThere is a great centered stillness in this poem that brings great peace. The dreamlike feel sweeps across the surface, with truth flickering up from the depths. Beautiful piece,Shay.
ReplyDelete