What Happened To Aunt Flossie
Arsenic in the wallpaper killed Aunt Florence,
her demise hastened by her habit of banging her head into the wall
at the slightest provocation.
Last time we visited,
my sisters and I chimed "Hello, Auntie,"
followed immediately by our polite curtsies
and more thundering head-bangs
which shook the house and dazed poor Aunt Flossie.
At tea, she spoke of being haunted by the spirit of a skunk
which had been living under the back stoop.
Her dog killed it, but the striped stinker in its anger
We held our napkins to our faces in order to endure it.
"How awful," we remarked,
upon which Aunt Flossie let her tea cup drop
from her fingers, and would have
banged most ferociously into the wall had we not instantly intervened.
My sisters and I are pious girls and we have faith
that the stinker will not be permitted to follow Aunt Flossie
into the golden gates of Heaven.
We shall miss her.