messed-up
more adventurous friend
who says, come on, let's pick the lock,
snap the chain,
and goose the gods who brought the rain.
This road is the place
where the one I was
met the lead-foot driver of who I would be;
and you know what they say--
women drivers
no survivors.
Oh, little tornado-heart,
shed that leaden skin.
Let the poison out, let the Jesus in.
Honey, a red car is the only car--
no you anymore, but only us...
I'll carry the best of you fast over asphalt and tar,
and leave the husk with these crosses
in the roadside dust.
for Real Toads OLM
Tight poem - you have real lyrical talent.
ReplyDelete...and poems from the road...nice
ha nice rhythm to this...
ReplyDeletei have a weird mixture of tracy chapman and van halen running through my mind...
leave the husk in the dust by the roadside cross...nice...
Women drivers, no survivors - never heard that one. :) Good poem, Shay.
ReplyDeleteAwesome poem, Shay. There are elaborate Desacansos on almost every road I travel here in Louisiana. I passed one yesterday and was explaining the word "Descansos" to my daughter and grandson (Spanish for place of loss). Synchronicity. xo
ReplyDeletePS: Fabulous site here:
http://www.descansos.org/
i never heard that before, "women drivers, no survivors." huh.
ReplyDeletevery nice. 'Goose the gods', I like that.
ReplyDeleteThe ironic tone of the poet is heard loud and clear above the devil-may-care tone of the speaker. A remarkable poem with a strong message.
ReplyDeleteIn my search for beautiful gardens, I came across the Descanso Gardens of California. I did not know the word also meant a roadside memorial or shrine. I love to learn something new :)
The conflicted narrative here is lyric and ambivalent, yet strong and determined regardless of its perversity. The shrine for the ones killed by the road, the road that is also the way out, the vehicle, a mix of spiritual, sensual and material, salvation and destruction, and on top of that, a love poem extraordinaire. Amazing what you can do in a few short stanzas--and I like the way you get the lead out.
ReplyDeleteEvery line of this is like a bullet. Wow!
ReplyDeleteI especially love the part of the road where the person the character was met the one she would be, the lead-foot driver (love it!). Love "little tornado-heart" being implored to shed the leaden skin. Wonderful writing, as always, kiddo.
ReplyDeleteThis is a strong poem...lyrical with a punch...nice work!
ReplyDeleteLoved it! And Bob Seger --- real Detroit rock, old school and fabulous! (Seger, Motown, and Mitch Ryder made it great!)
ReplyDeleteBrilliant, bold with imagery and punchy lines - love the way the rhythm carries me, fast and faster...
ReplyDeleteThe movement is matched by the desire. I really loved this, Shay.
ReplyDeleteLoved this! That phrase "goose the gods" made me chuckle.
ReplyDeletefine blend of wit, irony, sarcasm and heartfelt anguish...esp the last stanza. kudos!
ReplyDeleteI read this over a few times..trying to decide; and after the third read I decided that they died...especially based on the second last verse!
ReplyDeleteHits pretty close to home in a few ways...that photo of the mustang...my aunt drove a Mustang into a canal at age 16 racing it the day after she got it....great sense of feelings in conflict in this one. It is what it is.
ReplyDeleteHow I ever survived, I'll never know.
ReplyDeleteIn your poem, I can see me when I was young and crazy. Even when I was older and shouldn't have been so crazy, but my brother bought a Mustang Cobra and, suddenly, there I was with my foot reaching for the floor...
What is it about cars anyway?
K
I had to look up the word Descanso, since I had not heard it before. Beautiful strong poem...
ReplyDeleteVery Neko Case-esque (another redhead to adore).
ReplyDeletexo
Terse and slightly schizophrenic. Had me bobbin' and weavin' like I was in a relationship of Chris Brown. I didn't know which way to turn. My kinda poem! :-)
ReplyDeleteimma not gonna say nothin bout women drivers, particularly me.......
ReplyDeleteyour labels are better than my poetry!
{don't you have to go back to work?}
♥ {mumbling under my breath as i go to your next f*cking awesome poem!}{oh wait! that's your last one... yay!...um, i mean, oh! i am SO sad that is the last one i hadn't read on this page! heading over to coal's now.}
Absolutely sublime, Shay. I loved this. It was a real trip.
ReplyDeleteWith some strong road music this is an anthem...of sorts. I love how you pulled this all together! Really well done!
ReplyDeleteI couldn't stop reading this one. I love "little tornado heart." I know that messed up friend all too well. Geez, I love this poem!
ReplyDeletei can relate to the need for some speed!
ReplyDelete