Reanimated Lavender Granola Switchblade Nun rides again.
Thursday, September 16, 2010
Anna's Boots
The room was full that first time,
But I picked you out right away
As if you had called to me in a secret language,
Like a high tone that only dogs can hear.
When you found me,
I was screwing around with little cotton clouds
When what I had gotten a taste for
Was the whole damn sky.
You asked me, "Do you trust me, baby?
I want to see how far I can fling you."
I said yes, because I already knew
How angels and devils sometimes create beautiful sin out of half-holy alliances.
My favorite devil was gone, and I missed her--
Time had not shook loose of me yet;
And so I searched for her echo in our short weeks together,
But all that I found was a dissatisfying ticking, like boots on pavement, walking away.
______________
for Magpie 32
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HOL-EE COW! Where to start? I think you might need to write a book! Seriously. I so love the little cotton clouds....the whole damn sky. Fantastic! And the ending.......the dissatisfying ticking, like boots....walking away. Just. Shoot. Me. SO good!
ReplyDeleteVery unique imagery, the poem is beautiful. The clouds got me too, the idea of the click of boots as time was definitely not what the average person would be able to pull out from the time picture.
ReplyDeleteIncredible! I love the care to detail-the informal language. It has a great sound to it.
ReplyDeleteTeresa
Great job!
ReplyDeleteI do love this and Anna's boots...I got some new boots today...however...Anna does have nicer laces..great job Shay...bkm
ReplyDeleteLove this, Shay:
ReplyDeleteI was screwing around with little cotton clouds
When what I had gotten a taste for
Was the whole damn sky.
That could apply to so much of life, couldn't it?
There truly is no substitute for the real thing...
ReplyDeleteWow-eeee! This is gorgeous, Shay!
yeh that walking away sound - dissonant to the heart
ReplyDeleteLove from the Moon
Yes, I know of which you write. Sometimes, we try to fill those shoes, often times we fail.
ReplyDeleteNice work, Fireblossom! I really like this!
ReplyDeleteI like the cloud stanza.
ReplyDeleteHow do you do that!?!?!
ReplyDeleteAnother awesome piece of writing.
Thank you.
jj
Wow, is all I'm feeling after reading it. Firstly loved your take on the prompt. The whole piece was a poetic justice to a loving memory... Like many others i too liked the cotton clouds and boots ticking away.. Excellent !!!
ReplyDeleteone of your best... xxx
ReplyDeleteone of your best... xxx
ReplyDeleteDammmit Shay, you keep touching my heart with these. This one is special. Truer words were never spoken.
ReplyDeleteThe whole darn sky... YES! That is me. I want the whole darn sky and what I am screwing around with is the clouds.
ReplyDeletewhen is your poetry book coming out? :) I want to buy it!
Wow - that is so descriptive of how that made you feel. Boots walking away...
ReplyDeleteI love the part about the secret language (like the ones dogs can hear). I want to learn that language, Chica! lol
ReplyDelete"I want to see how far I can fling you..." (That's my other favorite line!)
Happy Weekend, my friend!
Gorgeous and evocative. Love the brilliant ticking of the boots ending.
ReplyDeleteShay this is brilliant and captivating...such a wonderful take on the prompt...your own style always takes it's own way like the "ticking of boots"...i love it!!! :-)
ReplyDeleteBeautiful.
ReplyDeleteSherry Blue Sky's comment says it perfectly ...
ReplyDeleteWOW, AMAZING, loved your Magpie!
Love it!
ReplyDeleteBene! Bene!
ReplyDeleteWarm Aloha from Honolulu
Comfort Spiral
The sound of any feet walking away can tear at heartstrings...
ReplyDeleteI love the stanza that starts with My favorite devil...of this poem. Your writing is very visual and you did a lovely job here.
ReplyDeletethis is a wordgasm.
ReplyDeleteRene
what a gorgeous take on a simple (hah) hourglass....wonderful imagery
ReplyDeleteWowie! Cotton clouds.....
ReplyDeleteWhen what I had gotten a taste for
Was the whole damn sky. This part really did it for me I enjoyed the hell our of this poem!
the clicking it sounds like a ticking clock a dustant cousin of the hourglass...i get it...smiles. nice write shay.
ReplyDeleteYes.
ReplyDeleteAwfully well written -- congrats.
ReplyDeleteSuperb, Shay. And surprising for me...because I did not know I was reading a Magpie until I came to the end. You sneaky devil you!
ReplyDeleteOooh I so loved this!
ReplyDelete"I was screwing around with little cotton clouds
When what I had gotten a taste for
Was the whole damn sky."
Brilliant! :-)
my magpie - http://panopticulated.blogspot.com/2010/09/shifting-sand-magpie-tales-32.html
"If you can't be with the one you love, love the one you're with"!
ReplyDeleteI love this! its so fresh
ReplyDeleteMy favorite line has to be -"...Do you trust me, baby?/I want to see how far I can fling you."