Sunday, September 12, 2010

The Irish Girl At Close Of Day


I tried to wash a small rug,

But the fringed ends got hung up with the agitator,

And poisoned my machine from within.

By the time I heard the buzzer,

There was only black water that wouldn't drain

And a hot smell in the air.



Things break down--

I can't fix them.

Things fall apart--

I can't even pay somebody to fix them.

My car is old,

Not looking so good--

I know just how it feels.

I know

Things go to hell and there's nothing I can do.



I had a love--

Now she's gone,

And time just goes on.

If I knew it was the last time,

If I had even thought it was the last time,

I'd have quit my job;

Smashed my watch;

Started living in my car.



I have all these poems,

Like faces in a movie house.

Last summer, they set off fireworks over the park,

And, with the rest, I oohed and ahhed.

Then we went home, each a different way,

And summer dragged on.



Now it is September--

Things break down,

And I can't fix them.

Things fall apart,

And I can't even pay somebody to fix them.

I am sober,

But I want to get high.

I want to listen to Joni and Melissa,

--those familiar songs--

And forget.

But my stereo won't play the way it should,

So I did dishes in the silence

And recited Yeats in my head as best I could recall it--

Until the day gave it up, fading, irretrievable,

And it was late enough to go to bed.
_______

19 comments:

Riot Kitty said...

Hey you. I am glad you have all of these poems, because I get to read them :)

Sherry Blue Sky said...

FANTASTIC poem, I love all the "things break down. I cant fix them" lines, I know that feeling so well. Very evocative that you segued into the love that broke down, that couldnt be fixed. Very haunting poem. As long as you can write like this, you will be okay! Keep writing, keep shining! Love will come again. Old people always say that, but it's true. It will:)

Sherry Blue Sky said...

Fireblossom, am answering your comment here in case you dont get back to that page of my site......a double rainbow is one complete rainbow that you can see behind a first rainbow......quite magical. In fact, that particular day, I was bowed down by stress, had a daughter in terrible crisis, which toppled my lean finances. After I saw the double rainbow, I drove into town and counted at least six or seven rainbows, in different parts of the sky. It was unbelievable. Since I choose to regard rainbows and eagle sightings as messages that all will be well, I took it as a good sign. And, in fact, as time went on, everything did get better. My daughter came thru her trauma. My finances didnt improve, but eventually returned to barely manageable..........I need to ask: what viral video were you referring to? Did I mistakenly post a link on my site that wasnt what I thought it was? Or did you mean all the footage in general yesterday - such a heavy day. This year 9/11 hit me harder than some earlier years. Like my grandpa, I seem to be getting more like a marshmallow as I age:) Thanks for reading and commenting on my stuff. It means a lot. Stay tuned. I am working on the life of a friend poet of mine who is AMAZING. Also very well published with a famous poet mother. Tres interesting! Out soon.

Gabriella Moonlight said...

Things break down, but we don't have to break with them...we can move from the ashes of the fires that they created and rise from those ashes a new and an amazing wonder of ourselves, we are the wonder, the enchantment.

You Fireblossom are the enchantment, I know that my heart is deeply drawn to you and we may break down, but we are still here and there is still life...out of the ashes comes our next life in this journey....walk with me!!!

I love you!
g

Scarlet Ily said...

Your poetry speaks to everyone...if not in their heads, in their hearts.

I hope you never stop writing. Ever!

faye said...

Love this..
I can relate in so many ways...
aaah but there is nothing that
can not be fixed by a little
( or a lot ) of ME.....melissa.....

TALON said...

I want to say something profound, but I have nothing to offer except that some things remain beautifully intact - like a poet's soul.

cinderkeys said...

Things fall apart. I'm pretty sure it's all my fault somehow.

Yeah. Me too.

mac said...

I can fix that washing machine
making all your rugs clean.
I can fix that car.
It will take you near or far.
I can fix that stereo so nice.
I can fix almost any mechanical device.

But, Shay, my dear,
the heart is to complex, I fear.
They say time will lessen the blue.
I hope that's true, for me and you.

Lynn said...

Yours words are so beautiful and sad.

Daryl said...

And what rough beast, its hour come round at last,
Slouches towards Bethlehem to be born?

Yeats .. j'adore

Brian Miller said...

shay, i would love to hear this one read...it flows wonderfully off the tongue and so full of emotions that feel so right and not right at the same time...very nice.

signed...bkm said...

this is one from the heart...and yes, life can be a bitch sometimes....writing seems to help me get through...your words speak for many that just do not know how to say it...i am glad you did....bkm

Mama Zen said...

You have such a gift, Shay.

Mojo said...

Wow.

"Late enough to go to bed." That resonates. In a sad, dysfunctional, fucked-up sort of way.

Been there done that.

Got the experience and the hope to share... and the strength to share it. Now.

But not always.

Not once upon a time when the place I most wanted to be was called "Else".

Wherever I wasn't.

Because it had to be better than where I was.

And my stereo worked just fine.

So did my washer.

And my car.

But there was no internet then, not like we know it now.

Otherwise, who knows what might've happened.

Or maybe it would have all turned out.

Exactly.
The.
Same.
Way.

Experience, strength and hope. It's yours. Take it. I have plenty. I'll make more.

Vesper said...

What a superb, forlorn melody your perfect words bring to me... My heart sings it in my head...
I know what you mean, yet we must go on...
xoxoxo

moondustwriter said...

I think many of us can relate - I did the living in my car thing.
Wondering if we might end up back there. Guess we would be in good company

Happy thoughts Shay

Moon smiles

Jinksy said...

Poems and you in the park and going your different ways - brilliant image, but I think the poems followed you, anyway.

Jannie Funster said...

You are the awesomest poet on the planet!!

xoxo