Reanimated Lavender Granola Switchblade Nun rides again.

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

The Adventures of Vajaysus, Girl Savior

Vajaysus, the Girl Savior, walks into Danny's Coffee Shop in Norman.

"Woman!" cries Chloe, and they high five and hip bump. The Girl Savior is well-liked here.

The little bell rings above the door. It is the Dark Haired Chick, tossing some guy out into the street, some guy who came too close to "her" booth, where the Queen of the Vampires (in black panther form) is shredding the vinyl and going "rowww rowww!" in an ecstasy of approval. 

"Did you know," Chloe says, "that every time a bell rings, a Succubus gets her wings?"

"Shut up," mumbles the Succubus around a mouthful of chocolate donut. 

Meanwhile, Vajaysus the Girl Savior has sprawled on the couch by the front window. She orders a mocha latte. Someone asks her why she is called Vajaysus, isn't that objectifying?

"It's Asian Indian," she says, lighting a cigarette off the end of Denise the waitress's. When she exhales, she looks like a dragon, except sexy. "My mother is called Kali. Actually, her name is Kelly-Jo, but what with accents and stuff, it ended up being Kali."

The Succubus perks. "The Goddess of Death?"

Vajaysus the Girl Savior and Chloe idly throw sugar packets at each other as Vajaysus answers. "That was all a misunderstanding. Mom was working as a nail tech at this place in Mumbai, and this chick walks in and wants a mani, so she has her sit in the chair and starts working on her, and they're talking away about men and shit," --she pauses to take a long sip of her mocha latte--"and so Mom starts doing her nails in this nice pink shade, when the chick does a face plant on the table and then falls to the floor dead. Mom was like, 'whoa!' and it turned out the woman had a fatal allergy to O.P.I. products or something. I mean, what was she even doing there, right? Duh. She should have said something, or gone for the henna tats instead. But nooOOOoo, so that's where that whole Goddess of Death thing got started."

"You lie like a rug!" exclaims Chloe.

"No, seriously," says Vajaysus the Girl Savior. 

The Queen of the Vampires is half conked out, lying across the Dark Haired Chick and getting an ear scratch; she is doing that contented cat rumbling thing.

Danny himself comes in from outside. "Hello, ladies," he says in his endearing raspy voice.

"Hi Dannyyyyyy!" comes the chorus.

"You old fart," adds Chloe under her breath, but loud enough to be heard. When they all laugh at once they sound like angels, Danny's coffee shop angels.

Then the bell above the door is ringing, people are coming in and the night goes on, like a drop of mocha latte sliding down the side of a smooth ceramic mug.
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12 comments:

  1. Earl Grey goes "rrrrow rrrow!" the same way when he's happy or excited...perhaps he is related to the panther?

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  2. A high five and a hip bump to you, Chica! Love that Chloe!

    ooOOOoo, listen...shh, I hear bells!

    I think my favorite poet just got her wings!!

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  3. That Vajaysus seems like a deity I could get behind...or in front of...Wait, it's not coming out right.

    She seems like one I could endorse. (?)

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  4. And so it goes on.....

    Aloha from Hawaii my Friend!


    Comfort Spiral

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  5. You make it all come to life, Shay.

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  6. you've gotta give me the address to this coffee shop. seriously.

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  7. Vajaysus the girl Savior. gotta love it.

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  8. Reading your writing makes me feel alive and in a manner of speaking awake, awakened...that place that is so dull and listless, comes alive and is restless in all the best ways...thank you dear Shay...
    brilliant as always!

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  9. Is this the first appearance of the Girl Savior, Vajaysus? I hope she'll be around for a while...
    Fantastic characters!

    Secretia

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  10. I so much love these peeks into Danny's Coffee Shop! Thank you! :-)

    the night goes on, like a drop of mocha latte sliding down the side of a smooth ceramic mug - What a simile! Wonderful! :-)

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  11. Danny's coffee shop angels . . . I love that!

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  12. It looks like somewhere in Arizona.

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Spirit, what do you wish to tell us?