I love you 33% more than the ordinary brand.
You are artificially sweet
To protect against tooth decay.
When your love spills my way,
I am more absorbent than competing towels, and am available in these designer rolls that you'll feel proud to display in your kitchen and bathroom.
When you are near me, I report increased satisfaction, as compared with the control group.
If you tire of me, I fold up for easy storage!
Take me out again when company arrives, one recipe serves twelve.
Our love is not available in stores.
Listen to this former NASA astronaut tell you why you are out of this world!
Try my devotion in original or delicious instant.
When you kiss me, my symptoms may include, but are not limited to,
Vertigo, excitability, difficulty falling asleep, altered affect and muscle weakness.
Our love is not for everyone. Ask your doctor if it is right for you.
Try my undying affection.
If not completely delighted, simply return unused portion of product in original packaging, with bar codes, for a full and cheerful refund.
Some conditions may apply.
Keep out of the reach of children and pets.
Void after 90 days.
Coupons doubled up to one dollar!
Discount may not be combined with other offers.
Call for my colorful brochure. Press "1" for details in Spanish.
Free 30-day trial!
Allow 6-8 weeks for delivery.
Hurry! Limited time offer.
Don't be fooled by cheap imitations.
Order now and receive, absolutely free, this handy wrench set.
Never shave again!
This offer not available in Canada.