Thursday, April 15, 2010

Ah! Bright Wings.

It is morning at Danny's Coffee Shop.

God is walking by with somebody's espresso, when she kicks something and nearly takes a header. It is (another) dead salesman on the floor.

"Gosh darn it!" says God. "Who got this one?"

"I think it was Chloe," says the Succubus absently, wrapped up in her book. It is Billy Collins's "The Apple That Astonished Paris." This is a step up from last week's trash novel.

"How's the book?" God asks this while stepping gracefully over the dead salesman.

"Oh, bitter...bitter..." says the Succubus. "But I like it. Because it is bitter. And because it is my book."

"Pffffft!" says God. "Hey what's that weird noise? It's coming from outside!"

"Sounds like a creature in abject terror!" observes the Succubus brightly. They both go out to investigate.

They look up.

There at the edge of the roof, is the Queen Of The Vampires, in black cat form, peering down and yowling, her eyes big and offended, in classic get-me-down-from-here mode.

"What's she doing up there?" says the Succubus.

"No clue," says God slowly. It is an error to believe that She knows everything. She could if she wanted, but she prioritizes. Hair product knowledge, then coffee beans, then famine and junk like that, and finally cats on rooves, which she doesn't get around to all that often.

"Ohhhhh," says the Succubus, the light going on. "She's up there with the Dark Haired Chick. Shoulda known. It's like those two are joined at the fucking hip."

"Please don't curse," says God automatically. 

It's true though. They are both up there.

"What the fuck?" says the Succubus. It's a reasonable question.

God climbs up the ladder. There, on the roof of Danny's Coffee Shop, she finds the Dark Haired Chick painting pentagrams. 

"What the fuck?" says God. 

She gets the Dark Haired Chick by the ear and drags her down off the roof, with the cat in her arms, protesting loudly. 

Later, while God waitresses through morning rush, the other three sit together at a table. "You know she's gonna make you go back up there and remove them, right?"

"Fuck you," says the Dark Haired Chick. 

"Row. Rowwwwoww," say the QOTV.

"Don't curse," says the Succubus, smirking. "All that work. Poor things. Oh well. It was the best of times, it was the worst of times...."

"Who gave you a library card?" It is the QOTV, who has shape shifted back to her natural form. She pronounces it "libary." 

The Succubus raises one perfectly arched eyebrow. "God works in mysterious ways, Her wonders to perform." 

God, rushing past with an order, laughs. Her laugh is like cherry Coke. 

It is morning at Danny's Coffee Shop. 

There was a dead salesman on the floor. There are pentagrams on the roof. (For now.) There is God, looking good in a white shirt and jeans. 

Welcome to Danny's.

What can I get you?
________

18 comments:

Patty said...

Cheery coke sounds good, thanks!

Jeannie said...

I do love the regulars at Danny's. I think I'll sit and watch.

TALON said...

Can I have a seat in a corner booth and maybe a stack of blueberry pancakes? :)

ellen abbott said...

Gotta love the ladies.

Mojo said...

You know what kills me (no, I"m not a salesman)? How this sounds perfectly plausible the way you tell it.

All that's missing is a brimstone plug-in. ;0

Mama Zen said...

What the fuck is always a reasonable question.

Love, love, love this!

Jannie Funster said...

Laughed loud and hard at God cursing after admonishing not to curse.

Ahh, Shay, Shay, Shay, ya makes me laugh, and I likes it!
xo

Blue Bunny said...

pleeze dont tell my jannie i bin reeding good pomes wit cussing werds. she thinks i all so nevir herd these werds befor. butt i not so innosents. hee hee. ;)

ox

Daryl said...

Cherry Coke with a straw, please

mac said...

I'll have a MtDew.

For Dine in. I just want to soak in the ambiance :-)

LarryG said...

somebody has been reading too much Joyce Carol O!
:)
well stunned!
or doned...
we4ll.. I mean - I like it!

whynotstartnow said...

Larry's comment cracked me up. Joyce would be proud. And it's lunchtime in my world, so I'll take a big hot bowl of chicken noodle soup. I think God says it's good for the soul.

Fireblossom said...

Hmm, I guess I am missing the significance of the Joyce Carol Oatmeal reference. Alls I have read by her is "We Were The Mulvaneys", which I loved.

Cloudia said...

Have you submitted your poetry to the New Yorker? You should.




Aloha from Waikiki


Comfort Spiral

Brian Miller said...

can you give me directions?
awesome!

Riot Kitty said...

God in a cafe...I love it.

Ily said...

The QOTV has her priorities straight...but Chloe's my favorite. If Danny's Coffee Shop were a reality show, I'd tune in every week.

Gabriella Moonlight said...

So as usual I am late to the party but I finally made it.

Oh I can literally see Danny's Coffee shop in my head...like a TV show running and the cat of regulars who I've grown fond of and amazed of and their tinge of darkness makes me sigh in understanding and enjoy their give and take oh and their use of the F bomb...LMAO!!!

Miss you, Love you.
G