Saturday, November 22, 2008

Cupcake



A chocolate cupcake joins the army,

But there are problems from the start.


The cupcake has no arms,

And so cannot take bayonet practice--

He is in fact repulsed by the very idea.


"I am a sweet baked treat;

Little children love me,

And I bring cheer to everyone."


The cupcake's sergeant is displeased--

The cupcake's uniform is waxed but not starched;


And to add to his troubles,

He has no mouth with which to cry "Sir! Yes Sir!"


But just when everything looks most bleak,

An army wife says, "Hello, Lonesome."


She looks right and left, but her husband is off doing manly things.


She runs an O.P.I.-painted nail across his little paper ribs, and says


"Come to Mama."


As he is lifted closer to her Max Factored lips,

His little chocolate heart expands with joy.


"Perhaps,"

Thinks the cupcake,

"A military career is not really my destiny."


Shivering with satisfaction, the army wife closes her Covergirl eyes and sighs,

"God bless America!"

______________________

14 comments:

Grace DeWitt said...

I love this! How did you come up with the idea of a cupcake joining the army? :P Very imaginative and so funny.

Shrinky said...

Still laughing and shaking my head. I'm with Grace here..who woulda've thunk about a cupcake joining the army??

Sometimes girl, you are just plain brilliant.

Fireblossom said...

Hmm, seems normal enough to me. The cupcake's mother was an eclair, and she drove a city bus until the other drivers complained about icing being left on the steering wheel. So she quit and moved in with a cinnamon roll.

What?

LOL, I can't think of two gals I'd rather make laugh with my foolery. Thanks for stopping in, ladies!

CHEWY said...

Silly funny, with meaning. Little cupcake filled army wife's empty tummy with sweet delight. The sergeant overlooked the obvious purpose of a cupcake... to be eaten.

Fireblossom said...

Too right, Chewy, he sure did, as he was meant to from the time he was just a little dab of batter.

I'm pleased you picked up on the sergeant. So caught up in the box that he couldn't see outside of it to see the simple joy of Mr. Cupcake. :-)

Jannie said...

A bowl of jello gets a job at an appliance store
but there are problems from the start. He doesn't have the spine to direct the women to lesser priced but just as serviceable washing machines. And when he has to sit out all day with no cellophane over him he dries up and gets chapped lips which is a real turn off for the clients. So he gets fired and goes to Denny's to drown his sorrow in chocolate cake.

:)

Mama Zen said...

Have you ever found something hysterically funny, but you can't quite say why? I think it's the army wife's cosmetics . . .

Fireblossom said...

Ha! Jannie, that's funny. I like the bit that he hadn't a spine haha. And of course we mustn't forget the devil's food cake!

Yes, Mama Zen, I have, and I'm pleased my little poem tickled you. I once saw a Star Wars spoof at a film festival, where instead of space ships, the combatants were appliances like irons and mixers. It shouldn't have been THAT funny, but I was reduced to helpless hysterics. This was in public, you understand, lol.

Gillian said...

An affair with a cupcake! Now you're talking.

-clevergirl said...

Oh wow, I followed your link from mamma warrior, that is a picture of the riverwalk in SA, I remember that restaurant, ok food. We lived there for two loooong years. *shivers* I never want to return there.

Scarlet said...

God bless Chocolate!

This is beautifully written. ;)

Lil Bit said...

LOL! ... Hope that cupcake was wearing camo! ;)
and I have a recent post on mine that includes what kind of cupcake I am (among other sweets)! lol, you should give 1 of those quizzes a go!

Fireblossom said...

Laffin @ Gillian. I sometimes call chocolate "girl catnip." LOL.

Welcome to Word Garden, Clevergirl. :-)

Hello, Scarlett, and welcome! My garden is your garden! ;-)

Lil Bit, you are obviously the sweetest sort of cupcake. I love those kind of quizzes. :-)

Fireblossom said...

*knocks the extra "t" off, to make it properly "Scarlet." smax forehead*