You Know Who You Are

Ladies,

Irregular church attendance may result in a disquiet of the female temperament, unstable at the best of times.

Left unchecked, such wickedness as lack of obedience and humility, and a failure to acknowledge the husband as God-in-the-home may creep in.

Extreme instances may involve fever, hysteria, and nervous agitation combined with a complete refusal to wear a corset and bustle.

Such women become easy prey for inverts, who may be recognized by their mannish modes of speech and dress, tobacco use, moral laxity and even literacy.

Beware!

Attend services.

Keep eyes downcast.

Depend upon the superior judgement of fathers, husbands, brothers or uncles.

Pray earnestly.

Daughters of Eve, do these things and receive pardon and protection.

Or not.

In which case,

Call me. ;-)

__________

The author apologizes for her complete inability to find a picture of a woman with a Joan Jett 'do, wearing a tuxedo shirt and leathers, to go with this notice. The discovery of such a marvel would allow the author to die happy, and then, of course, descend directly into everlasting torment, where all her friends will be waiting. Neat-o!

Photograph: Marlene Dietrich