My Dream Of Starfish

The older I get, the more I admire Mucha's women and Gibson girls.

I want to be them. I do.

I want to wear a hat that takes up half the room,

So nobody can see around me.

I want a long dress with a sash,

Endless thick hair and curves like nobody's business.

I want to be young in a way that I never was--

Give me ten minutes

And I could run the goddam place.



Look at me, I'm a mess.

I grind my teeth and dream of angels.

I dream I'm at work and can't find the addresses;

Hallways go on and on and nothing makes sense.

I dream I am making love with someone, yes, that one I can't have,

And when I wake up, I am like a wave--

I am flowing and spreading;

There are starfish next to my pillow and on my sheets.



I want to catch a trolley car to the flickers.

I want to smoke sitting on the church steps, with my wrists dangling on my knees.

I want to believe that I am good enough, just once.

I want fall to come, I want red leaves on everything;

I want winter to follow and freeze them.

I want to pick out my grave before I die,

I want to dream there,

I want someone to bring asters in the summertime and say, "There she is. The poet."

I want my visitor to wear something vintage.

I want her to look like Evelyn Nesbit;

I want her to be me, the me I never could be.

I want her to look like an angel,

Or a Gibson girl.

I want her to wear starfish earrings.

__________

for One Shot Wednesday

poster art by Alphonse Mucha